THE PLOT: ‘Soldier Sailor’ by Clare Kilroy is a literary novel about motherhood. The novel opens with our protagonist, Soldier, mentally composing her own suicide note while smiling over her new baby, Sailor. It then weaves back and forth in time, taking the reader deep into the early days of motherhood. Exploring the clash between this new, deep, unfathomable love for her child vs. struggling with such a seismic change in identity, our protagonist meets an old friend who reminds her of the woman she used to be. But is there a way to reconcile both identities or must she choose between Madonna and Mother?

RATING:  This is a strongly atmospheric book that is expertly written. A short, sparse and very deliberate novel, it draws in the reader and envelops you in the mindset of a struggling mother. It’s raw and honest and doesn’t shy away from the realities and sexism of modern parenting. The narrow scope allows it to dive deeply into the theme, including exploration of the loss of one’s career and the wildly different expectations for mothers vs. fathers. In my early thirties and surrounded by new mothers, I felt this book keenly and it spoke to me as it surfaced my own anxieties about potential motherhood. Therefore, it’s four stars from me.

GOOD BITS:  This is a supremely well-written book. It’s the kind of literary novel where you can tell the author deliberated over every single word. The narration brings you into the world of the protagonist with a keen, heady atmosphere that is somehow created without being overly descriptive or with forced poeticism. The struggles of Soldier felt intensely relatable and I loved how she was depicted as going through war. As I’ve seen from people in my own life, motherhood is really the trenches!

NOT SO GOOD BITS:  Although I hate to admit it, I became annoyed at the main character towards the end. I wanted her to tell her husband to FUCK OFF. Or, at the very least, I wanted her to give him responsibility to be an actual parent. Perhaps my feelings show the skill of the writing because I believed in the characters as a real couple and wanted to scream at sexism playing out in the story. I felt a tad annoyed that he never really saw the error of his ways but I guess this is how real relationships work, unfortunately.

OVERALL: I’d recommend this book to fans of ‘Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason (themes), ‘Milkman’ by Anna Burns (style) and ‘Letter to my Daughter’ by Maya Angelou (format).

Thank you to Faber & Faber for my #gifted copy. This book is available to buy on my bookshop.org (link here).